Ode to Blank Pages

i fear you, blank page;
empty void, inflationary Universe!
always room for more fear,
just one more page -
this page is for kittens,
and the next for thistle blossoms!
where shall the rain go,
the cleansing of memories?

when will you overflow
into love, again?

has it been so long?

i fear you.
murderer of countless dreams,
conqueror of the sacred,
your names are endless,
i fear each new awareness.

i have tried, fruitlessly,
to banish you, blank page,
to ignore you, hide you,
sabotage your utility
with scissors and wine.
always unfed, demanding:
how do your screams
get into my sleep?
i lie to interrogators,
(as to myself)…