Sweet little doll, you’ve never said a word. You’ve been on my mind, you may have heard Your momma and I, we aren’t really talking It’s been a long time since I went a-walking. If my memory serves, you’d be almost 8 And in my dreams, honey you’re doing great. When you lost your first tooth, wish I’d‘ve been there Money under the pillow doesn’t show how I care. Christmas shopping, sometimes I pick things that you might enjoy, white gold diamond rings, a puppy, a kitten, a new dress or some mittens; I worry about times in you’re life you’ll be smitten. I missed your first steps into this cold world You’ve done well for your self, sweet little girl. You made straight A’s in all of your classes You’ve given the world rose colored glasses. I wish I could say that I’ll make you proud As you look upon me from your highlighted cloud, But I know who I am and for that I’m ashamed: A drunk and a washout of inconsequential fame. I use to believe that I’d be someone great And I was in that moment that you were made, It’s the failures of vision and selfishness That I left myself in this lonely mess. I never imagined myself with your stroller Or the high chair outgrown as you got older, The crib to give to a neighbor family – All of these things seemed too much for me. I made these choices and now I live with them A bed of roses with thorns in their stems. I thought that I might be doing you a favor There’s a taste in this life that I’ve never savored There’s people that’s poor and people are wretched I thought I could save you from all of this hatred Unkindness abounds and the world seems to conspire That people in charge will always reign with fire. It was the hungry and starving I thought you shouldn’t see It was a distortion of myself that I’d wanted to be. I figured you deserved something a little better Than this haggard world on a tarnished platter. I’m not asking that you think of me You’re only daddy is what I can’t be, On your way to dance class or violin lessons I’ll keep you in my heart, a private confession.